Now, I’m not the most popular girl with the most friends, but with the handful of friends I DO have, I care very much about all of them. And when one of those friends goes through something as awful as a breakup, it hurts a little piece of you. It’s like getting towel-whipped right in the heart. Seeing someone you care about feel like shit isn’t nice. I’ve been seeing some of that with a couple of people recently. Some I’m extremely close with, others I used to know from school.
Some people feel worthless or undateable after it happens. They feel like their lives are over and nobody will ever want to be with them. Luckily for me, I know what I am worth. I know I’m a good person and that if somebody doesn’t want me, then I sure as shit don’t need them.
I’ve been through it. A break up. I’m gonna be honest here, it IS one of the most awful things to ever experience. I’ve been on both sides of the table. I’ve broken up with someone before and I’ve been broken up with. And although my small number of relationships/involvements have been pretty short, it still sucks. And it can still hurt. I remember being home alone after it happened and I cried so much, the muscles in my stomach began to ache, my mum had to sleep in my bed with me, I went to sleep crying, I woke up crying, I didn’t go to work for 2 days. I was a state. It wasn’t a good time, to be honest. Then suddenly, things started to change. I started thinking differently. I started doing a few new things that I’d never really tried before:
- Learn to fall in love with yourself
- Discover more about YOU. What you like, what you don’t like
- Experiment with yourself
- Breathe in the single life
- Don’t have any rebounds or try and get over them by being with someone else
- Focus completely on you and your life
- Get to where you want to be, by yourself
- Look at yourself in the mirror and enjoy what you see
- Keep the bitching about them to a minimum
- Make yourself the best possible version you can be
If you even as little as attempt these things, you will be set and ready for not only the next lucky person to enter your life, but for YOU. You will be a better YOU.
I’m not gonna say that it won’t hurt for a little while. It will. Obviously. Do what you have to do. Let it all out. Take a few days off work like I did. Chuck out anything and everything to do with them (again, like I did), Cry till you simply don’t have the energy anymore, Take the time that you need, but once you say you’re done crying and once you have fully accepted the situation, get back up on your feet and keep going.
Yeah, you got f*cked over and your heart is broken. Maybe a little bit, maybe a lot. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t carry on. Start over. Turn the page and begin again. This is just one little chapter of the glorious book that is YOUR LIFE.
Fill the next chapter up with happiness, love, kindness, self-belief, self-love and so much more positive things that one day, you’ll wake up and be ok with how everything turned out. The pain will weaken, it will get duller until you no longer feel it. It will disappear. And you’ll think to yourself “Shit. I made it”
This post is dedicated to 2 very special friends of mine.
All my Love